Forecast (original poem)

I'm pissed, so I'm obsessively writing poetry. Some people I'm not sure I'll ever be able to really, fully forgive for how much they've hurt me over the last six months have had me crying for the four or five hours off and on. I hate crying (for myself, not others), it gives me nasty headaches. Add to it that I feel entirely stabbed in the back by one individual in particular and I'm in a bit of a rage that means I'm probably back to the insomnia that I had last week that I had JUST gotten back into some measure of control in the last two days. And it appears it was for nothing, because the jerks are going to get their way. People in positions of authority took their word over mine even though they easily verifiable mislead those authority figures. I'm not going to stop fighting this injustice, but I will NOT be engaging in this process that has been used to abuse me so thoroughly for the last several months. I wrote the following poem in reaction, if I continue to be unable to sleep I'll try working on my novel (which these asshats have distracted me from nearly every available minute I've had to work on for the last six months. I had PLANNED to have the first draft around 80,000 words done by Halloween. Because of them I barely touched it after September and I haven't written a word in it from what I can remember of the last two months.). Fuck you, gaslighters. I'm taking myself back.

Forecast

I’m not as sexy as an earthquake
or tsunami
you got me
coming at you like a hurricane
it’s all the same
no fancy telethon
to bring it on
all the sympathy
empathy
what I need
is nothing like you’ve ever seen.
Watch your step
I’ll bring you down
so much bigger on the inside
I reside
bide
my time is ticking away
yesterday
came too soon
predictable as the moon
and yet still I’m stunned
by the stab to my back
debris flying everywhere
no one cares
catch the flack
zooming past
like my son
moving on
can be done
or so I’m told
as I linger on
suffering prolonged
wonder why
I
don’t
say
good
bye.


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